It seems that many people are shocked to hear that I am old enough to have grown children and even more so that I am the grandmother of 2 beautiful babies. It's TRUE! Quite honestly, I couldn't be happier about it either.
I am 38 with a daughter who is 21 and a son age 17. My granddaughter, LiLi will be 3 in February and my grandson is newborn just turned 1 month. They are by far the most beautiful babies in the world but of course I am biased.
At first, the news of my daughter's pregnancy came as a shock and I was immensely disappointed. Not only was she young, unmarried and still finishing school, but the father of her child was as a mystery to us. Apparently, she had been having a grown relationship with him behind my back for some time. I wasn't sure how to handle having such a life changing event in what was already chaotic disfunction between her and I.
It took a couple of months to swallow the pill of reality that this was going to happen whether I liked it or not, and soon I would warm up to the fact that I was going to be a young grandmother just like I made my mom at age 17 and the same for her. For generations, we've been young mothers and look how we turned out lol. I learned to embrace my young grammy status and ran with it.
Of course, once that beautiful baby took her first breath and I looked in her eyes, I was totally in love! How could you not love such an innocent and beautiful little girl? I knew then she was going to have me wrapped around her finger and have my heart forever. The same thing happened when I met my grandson just a couple of days ago. These kids deserve all the love in the world, and I will for sure make sure they get it.
So how did I deal with it? It's REALLY simple. LIFE happens and you have to take things as they come. My granddaughter was the mending source of my relationship with my daughter. Prior to her birth, we couldn't get along and had major communication problems that made our relationship extremely unhealthy. I realized that I would much rather accept that this was uncontrollable and I didn't want to miss out on their lives because I refuse to accept what was far too late to change.
Having a relationship with my kids is necessary, and that includes their children. If you are struggling with the idea or reality of becoming a grandparent, take into consideration what would be worse? Dealing with the inevitable, or alienating your family simply because of your inability to deal with life? It's NOT worth having your child go through the blessing of bringing a life into the world without you, the most important person in their life! Swallow your pride, forget what others may think and just be the support system and loving person a grandmother/father is supposed to be!
It takes a village to raise a child, but it takes a mother to love a child like no other.